Boys in a culture of honour who are allowed to have sex before marriage are more restricted and more exposed to violence than boys who are expected to remain virgins.
This is shown in a study by Örebro researchers Jan-Magnus Enelo and Rúna í Baianstovu and Gothenburg researcher Sofia Strid, who are researching honour cultures.
Previous research has often focused on daughters, showing that they are expected to remain virgins until marriage. However, fewer studies have focused on sons, and these are often more vague about whether sons are also expected to remain virgins until marriage.
“Sometimes boys are described as if they are expected to be virgins, but more often they are portrayed as ‘freer’ in that, as long as they help to watch over and control their sisters, they themselves can be sexually active since virility is associated with men and should be practised.”
“But the notion of sons being freer and less constrained turned out to be almost paradoxically false,” says Jan-Magnus Enelo.
Expectations as adults
In his study, he divided boys with experience of honour culture into two groups. The boys in the first group are expected to remain virgins until they marry. Some are allowed to choose their marriage partners freely, while others in the same group are not.
Boys in the second group are not allowed to choose a marriage partner, but there are no expectations of chastity as long as they, as adults, marry someone of their family's choice or approval. In other words, they are allowed to be sexually active.
“Regarding background, there are no major differences between the groups. They are equally likely to have parents who were born outside Europe, are unemployed, and have a lower level of education. However, boys who are expected to remain virgins report that their parents are more religious,” says Jan-Magnus Enelo.
School and leisure activities
The differences between the groups of boys are mainly related to school and leisure activities, but also regarding family violence.
The group of boys expected to remain virgins are more likely to attend classes on sex and relationships, physical education and school-organised sleepovers and parties. They are also more likely to participate in leisure activities, use social media and socialise with other boys.
“Thus, boys who are expected to be virgins have a freer lifestyle than those not expected to be virgins. They are only equally restricted when visiting girls in their homes. Consequently, it is when parents feel that virginity is at risk that these boys live under more restrictions.”
Socialising – and being punished for it
In addition, the study shows that boys who are not expected to be virgins are more vulnerable to violence by family members. This can include being spat on, having things thrown at them, being locked out, ostracised, confined, sexually harassed or assaulted or threatened with violence. They are also more likely to have exerted violence against other family members.
“Socialising into virility likely involves testing boundaries, and being punished for it,” says Jan-Magnus Enelo.
“In Swedish studies, expectations of virginity, or having one's sexuality controlled in other ways, have been a common way of identifying young people who live in a culture of honour. This article shows that we need to evaluate new ways of studying honour, something we will now work on further,” concludes Jan-Magnus Enelo.
Additional facts:
The research is based on survey responses from over 6,000 pupils in year nine in Stockholm, Gothenburg, and Malmö in 2017 and 2018. The boys are divided into three groups: two groups with culture of honour experiences and one group with other boys.
The study shows that there are major differences between the two groups with culture of honour experiences compared to the others, not least in terms of the parents' backgrounds and situations.